It is with a heavy heart (and a rather intimidating team of lawyers right outside my window) That I must announce the possible end of the
Last Resort webcomic.
You see, the operations of
Anonymous and their "
Project Chanology", with massive worldwide protests staged by
over 9000 people worldwide, have caused great distress to the Church of Scientology. The church, in turn, is seeking out any and all information they can find on "suppressive persons", which they consider enemies of Scientology. Apparently this includes the authors of almost all science fiction, which -- at least according to their lawyers -- is copyrighted in its entirely by L. Ron Hubbard. Furthermore, they claim that
Last Resort is blasphemous propaganda against the church.
Particular infringements upon Mr. Hubbard's works (and Scientology Scripture) allegedly include:
- Jigsaw being an alien vampire who sucks blood (as an apparent allegory to the "money-sucking" ways of the church)
- The unfair representation of L. Ron. Hubbard as Vincent Vaeo, a money-hungry lizard who loves to physically attack and abuse his subordinates.
- The concept of souls as creative energy to unlock, as this is a direct ripoff of the concept of Thetans and their superhuman powers.
- Depictions of the Alien Lord Xenu (though they won't seem to tell me which character looks like Xenu the most - I suspect it's Adharia, for what it's worth)
- Depictions of the Marcab Confederacy, as shown by having multiple species working together.
- And finally, the Last Resort reality show itself is somehow a damning analogy to the Flag Building in Clearwater Florida, based on the promises of "total freedom" offered by Last Resort despite the fact that the people running the show clearly want everyone to either keep making them money or just die.
There's still hope, though: the lawyers have brought in a Scientology chaplain who says I can continue to work on the comic if I join their church, plus a $50,000 "royalty fee" for using L. Ron. Hubbard's works (the royalty fee gets waived, however, if I also agree to join their Sea Org). In exchange,
Last Resort becomes official, legally copyrighted property of the Church of Scientology, exclusively available to members of the church for free. (Non-Scientologists will be expected to pay a nominal fee to continue viewing future pages.)
Further details are
here. I'll be issuing a more formal response once I decide on an appropriate course of action.
Labels: april fools, scientology is serious business, this is a joke
Gotcha.
